February 4th, 2008 by Aaron from FullTiltMarriage.com ·
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“My ex-wife still tries to dominate me and interfere in my life. I have moved on and have a new woman. My teenage daughter and I have a very good relationship but whenever my ex-wife is around I am reminded why I divorced her. How do I get her to understand she is divorced and must get a life of her own?”
Your mutual connection, the daughter whom you co-parent, will remain integral to both of your lives. It will therefore be to the advantage of all concerned if you remain kind, forthright and strong in all of your dealings with the woman whom you once loved enough to marry.
Include your “new woman” in as many interactions with your ex-wife as possible. This will serve as a constant reminder to your ex-wife that you have, in fact, moved on.
As an aside, I’d suggest that while your ex-wife’s behavior continues to elicit a strong reaction from you, you may not have “moved on” as much as you might think.
You remain as powerless over your ex-wife as you were when you were yet married. I’d suggest you take time to evaluate the reasons she can so effectively get under your skin. What is it about you, that her behavior so gets to you?
Art by Lynne Lancaster
Rod Smith has taught family therapy and courses on related topics for various institutions, primarily The University of the Nations, in many locations around the world. His “YOU AND ME” newspaper column is widely enjoyed in South Africa where it has been published daily for almost to 7 years.
So valued are Rod Smith’s methods of intervention that high-profile, highly conflicted families have flown him half the way around the world to assist in finding some manner of resolution to seemingly insurmountable dilemmas.
Rod writes the Difficult Relationship Blog and is available to help you with your own difficult relationship issues. You can reach Rod via email Rod@DifficultRelationships.com OR “RodeSmithMSMFT” on SKYPE.
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February 4, 2008 at 11:25 am · Filed under Family, Marriage Counsel, Relationship Help, Relationships
January 14th, 2008 by Aaron from FullTiltMarriage.com ·
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Yesterday I wrote about resolutions that you can use to create a more loving relationship. Today I would like to focus on one specific topic affecting all relationships: sexuality.
Take a look at your sex life with your partner. Is it everything that you want it to be? Is there some part that you think could use a little improvement? Here are a list of resolutions that you might make for your own sex life.
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I will take responsibility for my own sexual desire. It is important to know what things create desire in yourself. What turns you on? Do you think sexy thoughts about your partner to get in the mood? Do you like to read steamy novels or watch erotic films? Whatever it is that turns you on, do those things.
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I will add variety to our lovemaking. The first step to banishing boredom in the bedroom is to add variety. Novelty brings excitement. It can be something as simple as making love in a place other than your bed. You could try new positions, learn to give a sensual massage, or share your fantasies.
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I will communicate openly and honestly with my partner about sex. Sex is an area of our lives that makes us feel vulnerable. This is one of the reasons it may be hard to talk to your partner about sex. You don’t want to be rejected. The thing is, your partner can’t read your mind. If you don’t tell him what you like, how is he gonna know? It is better to talk openly about sex, than to hold it in and let resentment build.
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I am responsible for my own orgasm. Many of you think that it is your partner’s responsibility to bring you to orgasm. I believe that if you want an orgasm, have one. That may mean teaching your partner where and how to touch you. It may also mean stimulating yourself while having intercourse.
Anyway you look at it, great sex is within your reach. Take this time to make your sex life as great as you always dreamt it could be.
Terri is author of
The Passion Blog and helps singles and couples
learn the skills to create and maintain loving, passionate
relationships with an intense sexual connection through her
relationship coaching.
To read her blog go here: http://PassionBlog.Wordpress.com
To find out more about her coaching go here: http://www.ingenio.com/Coach+Terri
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This book will help you BOTH find happiness and fulfillment.
Just click here to begin having the marriage of your dreams!
Art by Geo Cristian.
January 14, 2008 at 9:18 am · Filed under Relationship Help
