Full Tilt Marriage.com

Lustful Looks: Look But Don’t Touch?

Posted on November 9th, 2007 by Aaron from FullTiltMarriage.com

In our society, we have a general rule. “You can look, but you better not touch“. Do you think this is a good rule to have in our relationships?

If there wasn’t a rule, would everyone have a lover on the side? Would you break your vows and commit adultery? Do you think that looking has any effects on your relationship?

I’m Married, Not Dead

Everyone, men and women, notice good-looking people. It doesn’t matter if you are committed or not. It is our basic human biology. We are wired to be attracted to members of the opposite sex. The real test is how we conduct ourselves once we have noticed someone.

I have been in relationships in which my partner noticed and flirted with everyone in a skirt. This really pushes every emotional and jealous button that I have. I know that it is just his personality and I am forced to deal with my own insecurities. (And let me tell you, I tend to have a lot) He was in my life to help me learn to trust and be more secure in myself.

I have also been in a relationship in which my partner rarely looked at another woman. The problem was, he rarely looked at me either. This too, pushes a lot of insecure buttons.

I think that the solution is to understand that you and your partner will see someone and be attracted. The way you respond boils down to whether or not you have respect for the person you are in a relationship with. Notice, but don’t ogle. Keep in mind that you made a commitment and that acting on an attraction will probably ruin the relationship that you have.

Terri is author of The Passion Blog and helps singles and couples
learn the skills to create and maintain loving, passionate
relationships with an intense sexual connection through her
relationship coaching.

To read her blog go here: http://PassionBlog.Wordpress.com

To find out more about her coaching go here: http://www.ingenio.com/Coach+Terri

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